..find me

8:54 pm.. night is getting deepr..add a splitting headache >> that's tonight for me.

what could be worse? a splitting headache or this feeling?
a dozen headaches please..
i drank and got drunk.. to drown the feeling away..
i don't like to drink , i have incompatibility issues with beer!
i tried learning how to drink.. waaahh! good luck!
im stuck with a headache..


someone told me i'm emotional..
yes, guilty as charged..

and I AM emotional.. i will keep it that way..
there was a point in my life that I felt nothing and it did not feel good either..

yes, im down.. sad.. broken and lost..
yes, it hurts so bad..
and yes, i cry..am crying ..will cry..
darn! im emotional..its because i feel..

i feel love..i feel happines.. i feel your presence..
i feel you.. i love you..i hate you.. i love you..
i want you.. i look for you.. you make me happy..

yet..

you..did not feel that.
i was nothing.. for you.
i am unimportant.
i was just there.. and that was it..
unimportant..

how does one come to terms with that..?
how do u make opposite ends meet..?
how can u find something that wasnt there..?
and how can it be like that..?


i'm sad..down and depressed..i know i should stand up..
but, i dont wanna pick myself up just yet..


strength, find me..